May 23, 2013
We all know a thing or two about love, don’t we? We have fallen in and out of love too, no? So, what exactly makes two people stick to each other? Opposites attract each other stands true? Well, let’s get your facts right and derail those age old myths about relationships that people swear by!
So, you might have friends who are looking out for the love of their life or others who might want to come out and get done with their not-so-fulfilling relationship! Don’t contribute in sabotaging your friends’ relationships by creating a room full of unrealistic expectations in their minds. After all don’t we really want them to be really happy with their partners? Well then here’s some bit of sifting of facts from myths which might help you give sound advice to your friends. This would quite certainly help men and women doing away with their biased approach and really understand what hold truth.
Myth: Opposites attract and this keeps the spark alive
Fact: The North Pole and South Pole theory doesn’t really work well when it comes to relationships. Yes, it’s only good in your Science books. It is similarities that keeps them together and lead to the most fulfilling and successful relationships. Although, their tastes in music, religious inclination or political beliefs might vary but the key aspect that bind them together is basic life values.
Quick Fix: Don’t you think you now look for someone whose values are compatible enough with yours?
Myth: No Conflict = Perfect Relationship
Fact: A lack of conflict means either you are keeping everything under wraps and are afraid of addressing points of disagreement or you’re too lazy to identify the fall outs in your relationship. Even when you two are similar minded people there are bound to be contradictions. In a long term study that was conducted by Dr Terry Orbuch it was concluded that couples who reported no tensions or differences on any grounds were not very happy over a long period of time.
Quick Fix: Don’t be a sheep. Learn how to disagree and yet not sound harsh. The key is to resolve conflicts in a healthy manner without letting things turn sour.
Myth: You have your own life and I mine. This will keep us happy.
Fact: Interdependence – social, financial or emotional – is an added incentive for couples to be happy lifelong. This doesn’t, however, mean that you must always be wired to each other. Apparently spend some time with your friends and indulge in fun activities with them. You mustn’t live a parallel life where either of you is not a part of your partner’s life. You will only grow apart.
Quick Fix: The idea is to live together and not apart! Couples who develop areas of common interest are much happier!
Myth: To keep problems at bay talk about what is challenging in your relationship.
Fact: See, for intimacy to occur in any relationship conversation plays an integral role. It is by default important for the partners to disclose their concerns. But tolerance level for both men and women in terms of i-wanna-talk-about-our-relationship is different.
Quick Fix: While some men and women might take it as a step towards bettering the status quo there might be those who might take offence and feel distressed about it. A word of caution in this case would be to be wise with words!
Read more articles on Relationship Help